Pagan Min
by Cheesecake44
Summary: Little drabbles and short stories featuring Pagan and those involved around him.


**Please enjoy, if you like this then go ahead and drop me a review.**

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**Drug Food**

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"Ajay, my boy. I feel like it's been a while since we last spoke," Pagan declared rather suddenly over said boy's radio. "And I realised that I have been the one doing most of the talking, the chatter box I am, so I hope you're not too busy to hold a conversation with your dear old stepdad. So, how are you?"

"Pagan?!"

Pagan glanced at the radio in his hand strangely as though it were a window to see the boy.

"Yes? Why the surprise, lad? Did you forget about me? Has it really been that long?"

"Where are you?" Ajay asked sounding genuinely confused however his voice held a bit of a slur, as though he were drunk.

"I am sat in my home eating dinner like a civilised gentleman, like you could've been before you shamelessly ran off." Pagan stated, taking an uninterested bite from a salmon dish in front of him, twirling the fork in one hand, he held the radio in the other as he lifted it to his mouth. "Are you drunk? Or high? Not that I would blame you for either, I mean, this god forsaken country practically shoves the coke up my nose what with all the shit that goes on in it."

"I...er, I'm, they, they gave me somethin- wait, wha- what the fuck is that?" Ajay sounded so perplexed that Pagan put down his fork to rub his forehead in amusement.

"You don't get high often do you?" He chuckled.

"There you are!" The boy damn near shouted into Pagan's ear.

"Christ, boy. No need to yell. Who's joined you anyway? Anyone I know?"

"You!"

"Me?"

"Yeah, that's...yes," Ajay seemed to trying to state things firmly and it was clearly not working well with his brain at the moment.

"Afraid not, I'm talking to you via radio, you know, like usual."

"What radio?"

"Jesus Christ," Pagan muttered, closing his eyes as though in pain. "Oh I don't know, the radio that I been talking to you through for the past few days, the one that's stuck to your bloody belt, or pocket or wherever you put it, it's on your person somewhere!"

"Wait, Reggie?" Ajay said warily. "Is that you?"

Reggie? Ah yes, Pagan could recall them now, he'd seen their faces on the passports and seen them by camera but hadn't had the pleasure of meeting those two fuck ups.

"Those stoners? Actually quite amazed they're still alive, they're very annoying to listen to-"

"_Holy shit!"_

There was a few seconds of scuffling, angry grunting and growling and Ajay's panicked noises as he ran from whatever he had pissed off. Pagan strained to make out what was happening and stuck the radio right to his ear to try and discern the sounds. There was another yelp from the boy before more grunting.

"Is that a rhino?" Pagan asked, bewildered as he pictured the scene on the receiving end of the radio. "My God, Ajay! All I can see is you running up to a startled rhino as though it were an old friend, you are running from it still right? Not gotten confused and started hugging a snake or anything?"

All that could be heard was heavy breathing and footsteps through the rough terrain. Pagan took that as a good sign.

"Sounds like an escape; good, good." He sat back and gestured for the woman server next to him to pour him some tea. "Tell you what. How about you come back up here to my home, where there are no rhino's I might add, and we'll try sitting and talking like normal people, hm? C'mon, I'll even ask the chef in my kitchen to whip you up something to eat, from the sounds of it you're going to get the hell of a munchies with all the running. You don't seem fond of crab, so what do you want to eat?"

"That's weird..."

From the sounds of it the boy had ceased fleeing and Pagan had the image of him crouched in some bushes with gormless, wide eyes.

"I'm sure it is- look what do you. Want. To. Eat?" Pagan said firmly. "Maybe had a big old fashioned English breakfast to knock off that kickback you'll probably get?"

"Breakfast? Bacon? Sausage and egg sarnie sounds..." Ajay stopped. "Sounds, er, nice."

"You sound thrilled about it," Pagan said rolling his eyes at the radio in his hand pointedly to Gary who had brought over some paperwork for him to look over. Gary smiled, or grimaced, humorlessly and waited.

"Also I could make a sexuality joke about sausage and eggs but I won't right now," he said, setting down his tea as he then muttered, like Ajay couldn't hear him. "Doubt your drug addled brain could handle a simple joke at the moment."

He reached out for the papers absentmindedly and gathered them in front of him as Gary made a hasty exit. "I've got to go, country to rule and all that but don't you worry; I'll have your food here and ready for when you get here- oh wait. _Gary_!"

Gary poked his head back through the door.

"Phone down to the kitchen and make some egg and sausage sandwich will you? Thank you." Pagan had already dismissed the poor man and turned back to the table. "Now would you want any sauces with that? Hello?"

No beep to signal that the radio had connected to the other, Ajay must've turned his off.

"Rude child," Pagan snorted and promptly knocked his cup of tea onto the very important files. "Whoops. _Gary! Print off these again! And some more tea would be lovely!_"


End file.
